Dealing with homesickness

What is homesickness?  

Joshua Kaplow says that feeling homesick is basically us wanting to be in a surrounding where things are ‘known, predictable and stable’, so essentially anywhere but uni at the start of the year. 

It might make you feel better to know that feeling homesick hasn’t really got a lot to do with what your home life is like compared to your uni life. You might find that your home life is actually a busy overwhelming environment, whilst uni is a lot more peaceful. And even if this is the case, you can still end up feeling homesick.

Homesickness is actually caused by a feeling of attachment to an environment that you’re used to whether that's a good or bad one, so throwing yourself into an unfamiliar space is bound to bring on these emotions. In fact, it would actually be more unusual if you didn’t experience it at any point during your uni experience.

It's important to remember that if you are missing home it doesn't mean you're not getting the most out of your uni experience, or that you're doing anything wrong. If you've lived somewhere for most of your life, around the same people in the same lifestyle, it's only expected that moving away from this routine would feel unsettling.

But it doesn't stay this way. Eventually, your uni lifestyle will become pretty predictable and if you stick at it you'll eventually get used to your new life. Believe it or not, for most people it actually turns out to be the place where they’d rather be! 

Tips for dealing with homesickness:  

Dealing with homesickness is difficult, but thankfully it's usually a short-term feeling. Here are some tips on how to deal with these emotions, so you can get the most out of your time at uni:

1. Let yourself be homesick - Remember, homesickness is normal. So don't be too hard on yourself if you start to feel this way. This doesn't mean spending your time wallowing in your feelings but give yourself a bit of time to let out your feelings, this is the best way to start to deal with them.
2. Immerse yourself in your new life - Don't use homesickness as an opportunity to retreat. It might be nice to get the train home every time you’re missing your family, but doing this too often will just make your uni space feel even less like home and you won't be able to build this all-important attachment to your new surroundings. Go out and spend some time getting to know your new city.
3. Connect with home - That's not to say pretend your home life doesn't exist. Give your home friends a call and keep them updated with your uni life! Or, bring some home comforts to uni that will help to make your new home feel like home. Finding a balance is key, so don't completely cut yourself off.
4. Don't compare yourself to anyone! - You might be wondering why it seems like no one else is going through this either, which will make you feel like you're doing something wrong. But don't compare your experience to anyone else's. Everyone experiences their own challenges coming to uni, even if you don't know about them.
5. Speak to people around you - Chances are most people at uni are feeling the same. So don't be afraid to reach out to them and tell them how you're feeling. They might be grateful that somebody else has started the conversation. If you don't feel like you have anyone to speak to, reach out to your uni support services who will help you navigate these tricky times.

Remember, everyone at uni feels homesick now and then. Don't feel guilty for feeling this way, and don't be afraid to reach out for support!

Like most people, you'll soon start to settle into your new routine and pretty soon you'll be looking back at the times you felt homesick like they were a distant memory. 

If you do start to get worried about the way you're feeling, make sure to make use of uni support services. 

For more information on how to deal with the challenge of missing home, click here.